Tuesday 14 October 2008

Cars & Bras


My nephew is the most gorgeous young man ever (excluding my Godson and his bro).
He's 8ft 6" (The Vampire says he's 10ft 9") and has hair like Sideshow Bob.
He's just finished a masters degree in something terribly exciting that starts with Geo-..
Nephew was invited to join the medics he had shared a house with for three years after they finished their work stint in India, we were worried, Nephew booked his ticket.
He journeyed to London to sort out his visa.
All went as planned and being a Country boy, called a friend and asked, what should I do to kill a bit of time?
The young lady in question sent him to look at the longest escalator in the world!#!!
Why (splutter) would you even mention that if you were female, to a chap?...were there not better things to see in the great capital?
Anyway, Nephew went to see the escalator, and thought it was really cool(speechless).

He left for India.
The first email we had said:
"on the way over we hit turbulence and dropped miles and a mans' dinner floated over the seat in front and i got showered with rice( a bit scary )!"

The next email read:
"the Taj Mahal was amazing. Rhys trod on a cobra when we were playing golf there. I had a monkey jump on me at some temple like on the jungle book."

He did a camel trek in the desert and slept on the sand under the stars, he had the most fabulously awesome time. He even bribed a zoo-keeper to get closer to the Tigers while they were being fed (why would anyone do that?).

Back at home, while he was away, another adventure was happening on a very quiet still night. We don't get light pollution here, so on a clear night you can see all the stars and mountains lit up from behind by the South Wales City of Newport. It's also very quiet, just the sound of animals munching, breathing..crickets in the hedgerows.

My Sister in Law woke when she heard a noise outside and rushed to the window, it was around 2am.
My Nephews' car was disappearing down the road.
She shouted to her Husband and says she's not seen him move so fast in thirty years. He gave chase in their other car, clad in only his pj's and slippers.
My niece woke upon hearing all the commotion and got dressed while my SIL phoned the Police.
Now it just so happens that my Nephew's car runs on gas, and only starts the engine on diesel, so within a mile the car thief had conked out and was just puzzling over the problem when my Brother-in-Law ripped the car door open and snatched the keys from the ignition!! There was a bit of a tugging and to-ing and fro-ing with the car door (and I suspect some eloquently choice words) until the the light fingered fellow pushed hard on the door from the inside, throwing my Brother-in-Law into the hedge!! Then the scallywag made a run for it while my Brother-in-Law unhooked himself from the foliage, probably very grateful that he'd had any pj's on at all.
Brother-in-Law returned home with one slipper and collected my niece who helped to retrieve the stolen vehicle.
Meanwhile, what was my sister in law doing?
Well somehow, in all the excitement she'd managed to put two bra's on and when she tried to take one off it was the underneath one and she'd got in a complete knot...

I just give up, I really do.