Sunday, 29 June 2008



We seem to live constantly in a rat race!!
Living out in the sticks, this is a constant source of entertainment to anyone who comes here..."We thought it would be so quiet here" is often the reaction.

Yesterday for instance, we all got up and surveyed the immaculate downstairs (my lady that does is just brill).
Everyone was threatened with severe pain if they made any mess, 'my boys' were coming (my Godson and his little brother) with their Dad and Step-Mum. 'Dad' was going to take some product photos for me to put on my website so I cleared the kitchen table and started to make up a wrap-around light box.

Darling Husband was rushing in and out giving orders for the day...it was his first year as Chairman of the Village Show and he was putting in wads of effort.

"Pick me up from the hall"
"Just knock up this poster with the Chicken Race rules"
"Phone Hywel and get him to bring a chicken"
"Who's manning the Crockery Smash?"

The Milkman arrived.
He put the kettle on and said 'mornin'!'
I was horrified..
He made no comment or looked the slightest bit surprised that I had a 5ft lawn mower box on the table and was lining it with white card...are we that weird in our house that nothing shocks the milkman any more?
He got fed up with waiting for our archaic water boiling method and made like Elvis.

I fed my piggies (31 now!!- I do fear I'm becoming a farmer) and unlocked my executive storage facility to get out new stock that needed photographing.
Right on cue, here come my boys, Godson now at eye-level (gulp!) and an aspiring Welsh Rugby player with a deep voice. In came the tripod, two cameras, laptop, cuddly toy and tea-set.

I pretty quickly realised that my multi-tasking skills were fading fast.
Making tea,
answering the phone "Yes I will give you a lift to the show, no it doesn't star for a few hours yet",
cooking pancakes,
setting up photo-shoots,
mopping pancake mix from my jeans and shoes,
delegating the chicken race rules poster to 'Step-Mum',
finding felt flower rings (where are they?)
chasing the cats out,
keeping the dog in,
teaching Godson how to make pancake mix,
putting out pan fires,
smoke extraction without letting the cat in and the dog out,
making coffee for those I forgot in the first round,
proof-reading the poster.. " Erm,I think there's an 'r' in Mallard",
answering the phone..."yes I will be there for the start of the fun run",
"Where does Darling Husband want the Purple sprouting planted? ..In the garden"

My boys and friend and lovely wife left with all their belongings, my children sat in the car.
Eldest daughter (vampire-pirate-fairy)looking all lovely
Youngest daughter looking pleased with herself at having managed to avoid a hairbrush all morning.
Middle daughter seemed to have already gone to the show with Mr Chairman, un-noticed by this caring nurturing mother.

The Village Show went very well.
No fatalities on the Fun run
No fighting over the vegetable competition
The ice-cream van didn't run over any children even though we thought he was making a very concerted effort to do so when he arrived.
No chickens turned up, I for one was very grateful, but Darling Husband was disappointed.
The highlight for me though was the local Mayor, who is blind, having a go on the coconut shy!!
Not content with missing badly, he proceeded to the crockery smash!
Then he had a go at skittles....

We came home exhausted and I was hit by the thought the house had been vandalised. There were broken and burnt pancakes all over the kitchen, wrapped around knife handles, sugar covered the worktops and maple syrup dripped from the bottle on it's side. The living room was no longer how I remembered it that morning, all the cushions were piled on the floor, throws were screwed up under the TV and my lovely feather sofa was as flat as road kill. There were empty cups all over the place...bugger!

I re-adjusted the living room and put all the washing up in the sink (thank goodness it's so big) and flopped onto the sofa with a glass of wine.

The milkman arrived.
He brought with him his lovely wife and daughter.
They also brought with them a huge bunch of gorgeous flowers (for dog-sitting) and a new kettle .. he's so subtle.
My children got out of bed and played badminton in their pyjamas.
We sat and laughed and watched our fab new kettle that changes colour according to the water temperature..awesome!

I'm such a tired little frog.

24 comments:

girl with the mask said...

Ohmyword! I need a lie down after reading that.

R.E. The ice-cream van man. We often assign 'points' to children, adults, old people etc when we are driving slightly waywardly. Adds a bit more entertainment I find. (Ten points if you get the chap with the stick, double bonus if you get his dog too!)

Lindsay said...

Do you mean an actual milkman delivering pints to your house? (Must be a rarity) or do you mean the milkman driving a tanker that collects milk? All in all you had a very busy day!

Jo Beaufoix said...

Wow, what a day. Sounds really good though,and now I want to make me a light box and snap some fabulous things. Mr B is the pancake maker in our house. Alas I am a bit delayed in the pancake area, sighh.

And the blind mayor sounds wonderful, hee hee.

blogthatmama said...

Did the blind mayor win any prizes? I hope so, giving his all like that. You sound like you had a busy but happy day. Sleep well frog! blogthatmamax

Mel said...

I am tired having just read that! I am gald the fete was a sucess, a milkman that makes tea, where can I find one of those? Hope your piggies are doing well and that you have a lovely rest. Mel

Mean Mom said...

I do so admire your multi-tasking skills! I don't think I am much of a woman, because I am not very good at multi-tasking. I try hard, but I always burn the toast. (I am assuming that Godson burnt the pancakes, not you!)

Love your piglets picture, in the previous post!

Tara@From Dawn Till Rusk said...

I have a very lovely milkman who has gone out of his way to make sure he has organic milk for me twice a week but he has never ever offered to make the tea. What is it you entice him with? A slice of homemade apple pie?
I love the photo too.

Frog in the Field said...

Thanks for so many comments already!
The mayor was fab, he won no prizes.
The milkman is a real milkman, we don't have a dairy herd, and he makes the tea because I don't bother to make it for him, I suppose! In fact he makes me tea far more often than I make his!

Mini-et-Moi said...

Looking forward to seeing the new pics - popped over to the site and the bags with cupcakes look fabulous!

Expatmum said...

Not that I have a milkman here in the Chicago metropolis or anything, but still - whose milkman lets himself into the house AND puts the kettle on? Sounds like a Jilly Cooper novello.

Guineapigmum said...

Good grief, I'm exhausted. Is that an average, run of the mill, normal day? Makes my life seem calm and simple. We still have a milkman, btw, but he arrives far too early in the morning for me to want him to put the kettle on.

Potty Mummy said...

And did Middle Daughter turn up yet?

Working mum said...

I'm exhausted just reading it. Love the idea of the kettle though. Might have to get me one of those when mine gives up the ghost.

Tattie Weasle said...

Oooohhhh panic - we've got the village fete this coming Sunday. OC dog show here - always a laugh as I always get it wrong but since I always giove everyone prizes they don't hold grudges for too long!

Berthddu Suit said...

Wow, what a day! I rarely see my milkman, let alone manage to get him to make tea!!

Karen said...

LOL - you've given me a whole bunch of ideas for our school fair...thank you frog. ROFL at the coconut shy.

Hope you've had a great rest ;-D

valley girl said...

It's so nice to hear that milkmen still exist outside of the urban sprawl. Last night was reading the Tiger that Came to tea (again!) and wondering if my Littleboys are mystified by mentions of Milkmen and 'the boy from the grocer' - I think the latter should be updated to 'the Ocado man' in fact....

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Well, quite clearly all ladies are impressed by your milkman(including myself). How friendly! Do a lot of the children in your area look the same? ;o)
Loved the blog, esp the bit about your daughter being pleased that she avoided the hairbrush all day. I have one of those. She walks around with dreds most days, age 4...

Frog in the Field said...

Whew, lots of visitors, that's really brilliant!
OK, from the top
Girl with the mask, try puddle patrol soaking pedestrians.

Lindsay, he's very real

Hi Jo, Blind mayor was very entertaining


Hi BlogthatMama, it was a good day

Hi Mel, give me your house number and I'll get the milkman to call in

Hello Mean Mom, I think burnt toast is essential for your child's development

Tara, I do not entice my milkman!!

Hi Mini, Thanks for your comments. ooh, heck! Still haven't sent you some samples have I? I'll get to it..

Expat Mum, I hope there's no smut involved inthis Jilly Cooper novel

Hi Guinea Pig Mum, That wasn't a normal day, but we often have lots of people coming and going.

Hi Potty...yes, I have seen her since

Hello Working Mum, the kettle is fab, especially at night so you can see the cool colours...must get the TV fixed

Hello Tattie, a dog show? You must be barking!

Welcome Berthddu Suit, what a fab Blog name, I coming to visit.

Hi Karen, yes I had to control my hysterics, I could easily have rolled around the floor.

Hi Valley Girl, thank goodness the tiger doesn't drink all mummy's wine too!

Hi Confused Take That Fan, I think I shall have to do a post about the milkman, you're trying to get him a bad reputation!
I have just left small daughter at playgroup with very messy hair, only to find her future reception teacher there...oh the shame!!

valley girl said...

Dear Frog, I have often wondered if Sophie's Mummy has in fact drunk all the wine already, and forgotten to do the shopping. So she has to invent the whole Tiger story to cover her tracks when Daddy comes home and finds the kitchen a mess, no food, and her daughter not bathed....

Frog in the Field said...

Valley Girl...OHMYGOD!!
You are so right! Ha HA!!!
THat's really made me laugh

Hadriana's Treasures said...

Like the vampire-pirate-fairy comment sounds extremely familiar!

Simon the Linesman said...

One would say that it is splendid to have such mirthful and Troubleless friends who would hither come to ones country residence and suffice to say rescue you from the bovine excrement whence needed..I pass to you our good wishes to yonder Newcastle ...xxxxx from the "friend and godsons and Wife""

Frog in the Field said...

'tis indeed so true S the L.
How divine of you to drop in my Blog and read about yourself and fine family.
x