Tuesday 14 October 2008

Cars & Bras


My nephew is the most gorgeous young man ever (excluding my Godson and his bro).
He's 8ft 6" (The Vampire says he's 10ft 9") and has hair like Sideshow Bob.
He's just finished a masters degree in something terribly exciting that starts with Geo-..
Nephew was invited to join the medics he had shared a house with for three years after they finished their work stint in India, we were worried, Nephew booked his ticket.
He journeyed to London to sort out his visa.
All went as planned and being a Country boy, called a friend and asked, what should I do to kill a bit of time?
The young lady in question sent him to look at the longest escalator in the world!#!!
Why (splutter) would you even mention that if you were female, to a chap?...were there not better things to see in the great capital?
Anyway, Nephew went to see the escalator, and thought it was really cool(speechless).

He left for India.
The first email we had said:
"on the way over we hit turbulence and dropped miles and a mans' dinner floated over the seat in front and i got showered with rice( a bit scary )!"

The next email read:
"the Taj Mahal was amazing. Rhys trod on a cobra when we were playing golf there. I had a monkey jump on me at some temple like on the jungle book."

He did a camel trek in the desert and slept on the sand under the stars, he had the most fabulously awesome time. He even bribed a zoo-keeper to get closer to the Tigers while they were being fed (why would anyone do that?).

Back at home, while he was away, another adventure was happening on a very quiet still night. We don't get light pollution here, so on a clear night you can see all the stars and mountains lit up from behind by the South Wales City of Newport. It's also very quiet, just the sound of animals munching, breathing..crickets in the hedgerows.

My Sister in Law woke when she heard a noise outside and rushed to the window, it was around 2am.
My Nephews' car was disappearing down the road.
She shouted to her Husband and says she's not seen him move so fast in thirty years. He gave chase in their other car, clad in only his pj's and slippers.
My niece woke upon hearing all the commotion and got dressed while my SIL phoned the Police.
Now it just so happens that my Nephew's car runs on gas, and only starts the engine on diesel, so within a mile the car thief had conked out and was just puzzling over the problem when my Brother-in-Law ripped the car door open and snatched the keys from the ignition!! There was a bit of a tugging and to-ing and fro-ing with the car door (and I suspect some eloquently choice words) until the the light fingered fellow pushed hard on the door from the inside, throwing my Brother-in-Law into the hedge!! Then the scallywag made a run for it while my Brother-in-Law unhooked himself from the foliage, probably very grateful that he'd had any pj's on at all.
Brother-in-Law returned home with one slipper and collected my niece who helped to retrieve the stolen vehicle.
Meanwhile, what was my sister in law doing?
Well somehow, in all the excitement she'd managed to put two bra's on and when she tried to take one off it was the underneath one and she'd got in a complete knot...

I just give up, I really do.

23 comments:

Catherine said...

Not only is your household hilarious, so are your extended family! I think we should leave your sister off tho' as she was probably half asleep whilst getting dressed.

Millennium Housewife said...

Please don't give up, you give us all hope... Great post Froggy, bras are tricky things aren't they? Husband gave up wearing them years ago.

Anonymous said...

It is very important to be properly dressed when dealing with miscreants. And, as all girls know, choosing the right underware is a key element in the overall outfit.

Trinny and Susannah would be proud.

Had she already decided against the suspenders?

Iota said...

That is hilarious!

Potty Mummy said...

Take TWO bras into the shower... ? (No, I know you wouldn't - but who knows about your sister in law?) (And that's a reference to a very very very ancient ad for shampoo, and a more recent one for Worthington's bitter - if you're wondering...)

Expat mum said...

I don't think at my most tired and incoherent would I ever put TWO bras on. Heck, one would be a miracle.

nappy valley girl said...

Perhaps it could have come in handy, had she made it out to help - she could have lassooed the thief with one of them?

Taz said...

Brilliant! I might put the wearing two bras theory to my teenage daughter for when she starts dating. If teenage boys still struggle with bra hooks then think how two will drive them crazy.

Mean Mom said...

Isn't that typical of a man? Always off chasing car thieves, when he's needed.

Mignon said...

Thats so Funny! Boobs always get in the way of a good chase.

Teena Vallerine said...

two bras better than none! t.x

Grit said...

blimey! you live an exciting life round there! who says the countryside is dull? (i've been in trouble over bras, so better make no comment on that score.)

Unknown said...

I can totally relate. If I'm going to give chase or do anything over a mild jog, two bras it has to be . . .

Mel said...

Perhaps the plan was to use one as a catapult and bring the thief down with some gravel from the drive...
very entertaining post and glad you got the car back.

Mom/Mum said...

very funny. I wish i needed just the one bra for suppiort, but sadly my hills dont run high...

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Ha. Hilarious. What an unsuccessful car thief to get the only gas car in the village! Your family and other visitors...you must write a book. As for the two bras, would you even bother with one in a crisis??

LifeBehindTheCoach.com said...

absolutely hilarious! good - very very good! great blog
Lynette

Hadriana's Treasures said...

"Blues & Twos"...now "Bras & Cars"...it could definitely catch on!!!

dulwichmum said...

OHMYGOD! It is all going on down there, isn't it! Your sister in law with her two bras - "two be sure, two be sure" - is she Irish sweetie? I love your descriptions, you always make me laugh.

Bx

Millennium Housewife said...

Please post soon, we miss you... MH

Omega Mum said...

I love a good adventure story with my early morning tea. Good for them!

Gone Back South said...

She'll never make a super-hero - they get changed in a flash. Great heroics from brother-in-law though. How exciting!

Pig in the Kitchen said...

Now i can understand pulling on a dressing gown in a naked moment of 'oh no, someone's making off with the car', or a baggy jumper or something. But bothering to put on a bra?? Does she have a chest requiring scaffolding from Rigby and Peller?

I am not at all jealous.
Pigx