Sunday, 23 August 2009



My wonderful daughter won First Prize at the village flower show with this vegetable person, and I can say with all honesty that her father's official position as Chairman had nothing to do with the result!

She's very creative and rather mad, I'm sure I don't know where she gets it from (innocent smile). She has the most incredible imagination and I'm sure she'll invent something completely amazing one day. My buckets, kept by the outside taps for watering my piglets, is often found containing a 'potion' that she and her friend Doodle have concocted. They spend hours outside with sticks and broken fence posts completely in their element and if I get a delivery while he's here they beg for the cardboard cases because it's just what they need to finish off their latest den.
Last week they tried to make a skateboard out of two long planks of wood. I think it finally failed on the aerodynamics assessment.

My youngest is following her sister in the mad stakes, last night she announced she would get her pyjamas on 'as quick as a bumble bee'!!

My eldest genius teenager was looking through the Thesaurus, perfecting her latest creative text when middle daughter said she thought big sister 'as descriptive as a pancake'! ...we're not sure if it was a compliment or not.

And it's got me wondering in general, surely it can't be my fault they are like this? But then everywhere I go people start laughing after a few minutes and it's not just because I may have my skirt tucked into my underwear. I have strange conversations with people usually ending with them choking with laughter..why is that?

Why do very large ladies always drive Smart Cars or old Fiat 500's?
Why do little men drive big cars like old Ford Cortina's?
Let's hope that Emma Chawner, who now lives in her car has something larger. She does looks like she's chawed through quite a few things!

Recent phone call:
Ms S: Hello I'm very posh!
Frog: Yes Hello I, also am very posh!
Ms S: I've had a pedicure, I didn't know what it was
Frog: Didn't you wonder what they were doing down there?
Ms S: choked laughing
Frog: That's very posh...I've had a spa treatment, that's posh
Ms S: Ooh I could do that now I've got 2 swimsuits that fit me. I used to have to wear one that was too small and one over the top that was too big and it looked a bit odd. Mind you, once I've got my black hat and goggles on it doesn't seem to matter....I'm a bit of a man-magnet when I go swimming!
Frog: choking, splutter crying laughing
Ms S: Yes, my husband has never minded me going swimming, but the children don't like my black hat.
Frog: I'm not going swimming with you if you're going to wear a black hat!
Ms S: I always wear a black hat
Frog : Oh (thinks OHMYGOD!!! surely she's joking)
Ms S: I do , I always wear it (sounding a tad hurt)
Frog: But you must look like a safety match!

Now I'm just wondering on a scale of 1 to 10 how much damage I've just done to my friendship?

5 comments:

Tattie Weasle said...

A well deserved first prize - it does have a bit of a WOW factor! Great Post!

nappy valley girl said...

Very good! Did you eat the aubergine afterwards or will it be preserved for posterity, to be produced at her wedding perhaps?

family affairs said...

That is pure genius - definitely worth first prize Lx

Jo Beaufoix said...

That is brilliant. Misses E and M are both sitting beside me oohing and ahhing. I have a feelig there may be rummaging in the veg drawer soon.
And that conversation you had with your friend was fabulous, I have similar conversations with mine.

Words are blumming marvellous aren't they?

A match stick. Snort.

Sharon said...

Loving the veggie person, especially broccoli hair, that's cool.