Wednesday 10 September 2008

New Term...when are the holidays?


And so here we are, just starting the second week of school.
Some things have changed in camp Frog, others things remain the same.
Daughter number three has started school, my (almost)14 years as full time Mum are over.

Daughter number two has a new teacher and is rather scared of her, so that means another year of amazing excuses to try and get out of it every day.

The Vampire loves school, ever the swot (don't know where on earth she gets it from) but has a new Head...she's missing the old one.
New term, new regime...healthier lunches. No school dinners where the smackeral of something lovely is the only thing eaten and one's children arrive home like savages in tempers.
Now all tempers are lovely and happy and I'm certain their food has something to do with it. So..
6am the vampire pokes at me until I get out of bed.
I get dressed (I think) and line up the sandwich boxes.
Empty the dishwasher.
Potatoes are peeled and cook while I get fresh salad stuff from the paddy field that was our cottage garden.
I wash and chop up fresh salad, prepare potato salad, slice cold (home-produced) pork and throw it all in the boxes.
Then I prepare the fresh fruit salad..ugh.
The mountain of peelings go into the pig food bowl (which is enormous).
Darling Husband then drives the vampire to school in his toolbox, I can't see it's a car any longer, it contains gateposts and John Deere filters and other odd bits and pieces.
The vampire strongly protests because there was a bottle of Bud broken by daughter number two in the 'car' and now she's concerned that she'll smell of beer in school.
Then I poke the other two girls until they get out of bed.
Answer the phone and listen to the vampire plead with me to drive her lunch into school...again!
I heat Baked beans for daughter number, she eats one spoon and says she doesn't like them.
Cheerios in a bowl..she eats one spoonful and says she doesn't like them.
Fresh pancakes? no
Rice Krispies? no
Argghhh!
Daughter number three, the new girl gets up, puts her uniform on, brushes her own hair (gasp!), puts shoes on the right feet and gets her book bag ready...perfect!
Darling husband arrives home in time to take the other two to the school bus and strap them in.
I feed the piggies
Empty the washing machine
Load the washing machine
Load the dishwasher
9am....
I'm shattered.

Our lady that does (otherwise known as the household cavalry, it's usually a fight just to get from one side of the kitchen to another) arrived and was delighted to be told Darling Husband had purchased a new vacuum. She hated the old one and was so happy when it finally fell to pieces.
The milkman arrived.
I stayed outside chatting to him while Darling Husband bravely brought our lovely lady that does, inside and broke the news that yes, he had indeed, against all her pleading, purchased another Dyson.
The milkman left.
I entered the kitchen and noticed Darling Husband was still able to walk and was surprised by an apology from our lady.
"Why are you apologising?" I enquired.
"I swore in front of your child, I'm sorry, it's just that hoover..."she pointed at it with an accusatory finger and then muttered "it won't be long before the dog eats it, anyway"
Later they were sat having coffee reading the Hereford Times and discussing the proposed changes to the city centre.

Darling Husband " I don't know why they can't just put it all back to a nice old city instead of trying to make it look like every other place"

our Lady "Yeah,....I hate change"

Darling Husband " I know, that's why I bought a Dyson.."
Silence.

22 comments:

Teena Vallerine said...

Since when was smelling of beer in school not a cool thing?! t.x (P.S. since you asked, pancakes for me please!)

nappy valley girl said...

Ever since your previous post about the milkman, I have been reading lots of subtext into his arrivals and departures- it reminds me of trying to decipher Under Milk Wood while at school!

Mel said...

Why is it that we seem busier when there are no kids around to interfere? What a lot you manage to pack in Frog, well done you and all the options sound lovely for breakfast. Hope the girls all settle!

allotmentbore said...

I hate Dyson`s too, and no hoover lasts a minute in our place. Like your blog. Hope you don`t mind that I`ve linked to you.

Catherine said...

I am surprised you didn't crawl back into bed after all that! My old cleaning lady used to say that Dysons ruin your carpets, convinced that they collected more than just dust and fluff!

Buddhist in Training said...

I'm not surpised you are waiting for the holidays already. How on earth are you so organised in the mornings? Come on get those kids trained up a bit more, mine get their own breakfast!

Expat mum said...

Tee hee.
Congrats on the achievement - 14 years of small person(s) in the house. Given as how they don't start all-day school here till they're about 32, next year, my then 6 year old will go into first grade and I will have spent 17 years in the house at least part of the day with a small child.
Small celebratory lunch due I think! (And, believe me, I am THE last person you'd ever think would have done the 17 years thing.)

Jo Beaufoix said...

Oh darling husband is so thoughtful. :D

A Confused Take That Fan said...

Frog - impressed with your packed lunches. Boiling potatoes at 6am? I bow down to you. Why does your cleaning lady hate dysons. We have one too, I remember being terribly disappointed that it's just like any other hoover and does not make task any easier or need doing any less.
I am also with Valley Girl. I noticed the milkman made an appearance...

Millennium Housewife said...

Home cured pork? Fresh fruit salad? Can I come and live at yours?

Housewifeinthehighlands said...

My God, what a morning and what lunches. And you really offer fresh pancakes for breakfast on a school day. And that's all before 9am. I am exhausted just reading it. You are Supermum.

Tattieweasle said...

You mean you don't have to be a full time Mum for ever!!!???? Please can I put in an order that salad sounds delicious...

Kim said...

I'm not going to let either of my children read your blog lest they look accusingly at me re: the packed lunch. So up market!
I'm with her on the Dyson, noisy nightmares that only lasts two minutes.
Kim

Potty Mummy said...

Pancakes? In the MORMING? Are you crazy? (or just a great deal better organised than I am?)

Millennium Housewife said...

There's an award over at my place, scroll down from the last post x MH

Anonymous said...

It's always a bit of a shock to the system when the kids first go back to school after a long holiday!

CJ xx

Mom/Mum said...

Wow! your cooking puts me to shame. Can we come and live ast yours please?

blogthatmama said...

Frog, now that they're all at school you can just drag yourself back to bed for a lovely kip once they've all left. Luxury!

Frog in the Field said...

Kitschen Pink!!
ps. Maple syrup or lemon?

Hi Valley Girl...what are you trying to say about the man who 'arrives'..Dulwich Mum has told me always to be careful how I phrase.

Hi Mel...there's always someone around to interfere.

Hello and welcome Ione.
I actually love my Dyson..perhaps because I don't actually use it.

Hello Ad Mother, my cleaner uses language that need hoovering I can tell you! I would love to crawl back into bed but my party bags won't sell themselves!!

Hi Berthddu Suit, I'm not organised at all. I can't really expect my diddy one to make her own breakfast can I? She's so tiny!

Hello Expat Mum, you and Valley Girl could cause trouble in my perfect marriage!!

Millenium Housewife..of course! One more won't make any difference, are you any good at ironing?

Och aye noo!! HousewifeintheHighlands!! Yes I really offer fresh pancakes on a school morning, I'm not a Supermum just anything for happy children eating quietly.

Hi Tattie, would you like dressing on that?

Hi Kim, welcome! Nothing upmarket about our lunch! Pork from the pigs (when we can catch 'em) and veggies out the garden.
The new Dyson is really noisy, but I have to say the last one lasted ten years..not bad at all.

Potty you know I'm crazy, but at least I can spell morning

Thank you M Mum, what a truly fab person you are

Hi Crystal, how are you? I'm just in permanent shock, I think!

Hello BlogthatMama, I'm so tempted to do just that this morning, but Darling Husband might not approve and Pig in the Kitchen said she'll phone me today....

More maple syrup anyone?

Carah Boden said...

Touche! (there's an acute e on the end of that word by the way!). Dysons, you either love 'em or you hate 'em. Mr Dyson's rather rich isn't he? So obviously more people love than hate. Have had one, but am more of a Miele sort of girl. Blimey, this is a dull comment. Let's move on swiftly...!

Are you MAD doing packed lunches??! I break out in hives at the very thought of slicing and buttering. Let alone at 6am. Middle girl is off on a day trip today and had to have a packed lunch - I was stressed for days!

Isn't it sad when the last one goes off to school after all those years of having a 'little person' in the house? I found it very difficult - for the first week, anyway! Now I panic if anyone's off sick and is going to be getting under my feet and in my space. Funny how quickly we adapt to the never ending changes of motherhood. x

Milla said...

Miele have asked me to trial one of theirs, or someone has asked me to trial a Miele because I hate my dyson so much and then blogged about it. (Sorry, Heron, am being as dull as you). Why couldn't "they" have picked up on my fudge fixation instead, sigh. But the only reason we even bought a wretched dyson (and modern ones are even worse apparently) was because our brief flirt with having a cleaner meant the cleaner insisted, the bag.

Sparx said...

Again, you totally amaze me every time - all that by 9am! 'Household Cavalry' ... now that made me howl with laughter. How are you managing now littlest is at school?