Thursday 17 December 2009

Worst Christmas Gift Ever



I know it's almost Christmas, the girls have eaten most of their advent calender (chocolate of course) and we have had our office party today. Not as good as last year perhaps, but very nice all the same. We had 5 of us at the party and only three jokes were the same in the crackers this year.
Here are the best Christmas stories I've ever told and I encourage you to read them. The first is about having the school pet for Christmas, the second about saving the day.

I've never written a Blog about my worst Christmas presents, but my dear friend Dulwich Mum is writing about such things and so I thought I'd give it a little mention too. Take a look at her fabulous post.
Shirl is not one for knowing what my taste is, she's a little more frugal than I am.
She did once give me a state of the art vacuum cleaner, small, but beautiful.
I was so chuffed!
I rang my sister in excitement and told her what I'd had.
Sister: "Is it the one Mum won in that competition?"
Me: "....gasp, um, (splutter) she what?
Sister: "Oh, sorry"

Furthering the theme, another year she gave me a pair of Marigolds and a bottle of Clean-o-pine.
Was my house dirty I asked?
Shirl: "No, not at all, I didn't know what to buy and I just thought it would be useful"
I was so not chuffed!

But the best worst present ever, was when I was expecting our second child.
I hadn't been able to eat much all through my pregnancy.
I had a few weeks to go and fancied some chocolate.
Darling Husband was really pleased to hear I wanted something, so ran to get the present Shirl sent me.
I opened the Terrys Chocolate Orange and was disappointed to see it was white frosted on the outside and looked a little stale.
Darling Husband grabbed the box and looked closely at it.
The sell-by date was 4 years previous...!!
4 Years!!
My sister almost died laughing..thank goodness for inhalers.
I kid you not
I think Money is the best gift, hmm......

8 comments:

Expat mum said...

The funny thing about people who give you crap presents is that they always leave big clues, like sell by dates or deadorant marks on second hand sweaters. (Naming no names).

Frog in the Field said...

Hmm...and then look so offended when they're rumbled, shocked even...'but I only bought it last week!!- I shall take it back to the shop!' (which we all know went out of business 5 years previously)

dulwichmum said...

Perfect Chum,

because I know that this is true and we have swapped tales of woe with regard to mothers, I want you to know that while I laugh my socks off - I feel your pain.

I love you Frog, you are the best.

Bea x

Harriet said...

When I was a teenager my mum gave me a fan heater and electric blanket!!
Needless to say I was not impressed.

nappy valley girl said...

My father once gave me the very book I had specifically told him NOT to get me, because I already had it....

Love the chocolate orange tale.x

Millennium Housewife said...

Ah regifting - guilty!

Tattieweasle said...

That is definitley teh worst Xmas pressie ever - do hope you don't try too hard with hers! Have a great Christmas with perfectly in date Choccies galore!

Sparx said...

Oh my, those are crackers. My worst was getting toothpaste in my christmas stocking...